Time To Live in the Moment and Not Somewhere Else

Taking ten step backwards from where you wanted to go is no fun whatsoever! Trust me, I know. I am there right now.

A good friend of mine told me "in ordered for an arrow to be shot forward it has to be pulled back."

And I thought, "Huh! Isn't that interesting! Well. Thanks, 2014 for being one of those pulled back years!" 

Let's move forward now!

Wait, I am actually kind of scared to move forward...

So I tell myself that one quote:

Anyways!

Or maybe I've just gone on the wrong road and am now just discovering that this is not the road to be on?

Ok, actually, I lied. I was supposed to be on this road, because I have met some great new people on the way, even though I have slowly slid down the slope of self-hatred without realizing it, the people, the new friends liked me anyways!

I just don't understand how they can, especially the old friends that still like me after all the scowling and ignoring fronts I've given them this past year. I have been barely living with myself, and now I'm like, "Girl, what have you been doing? For goodness sakes, we need to stop trying to get something that is not meant for us and go for what is."

Which is giving yourself time to do what you NEED, not what you want to NEED. Accept that the want to write is not right now, or the want to watch something is not right now, and accept the need to workout is right now, or the need to write is right now, or the need to hang out with friends is right now, or the need to journal is right now, or the need to figure out the workout for tomorrow or even today is....or the need to...whatever your heart is telling you (which is God's Spirit leading my heart by faith - for I may not be able to plan out my hour by hour, because then I am not trusting God to provide me with what I need each step of the day.

Matthew 6: 25-27:

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?"